Cover Bands: III Communication’s NHL 14 Cover Vote Endorsements

by J.R.

Voting begins today for the cover dude for EA Sports NHL ’14. As per tradition, the company has called upon fans to make the choice, employing a voting system more complicated than the way the Republic of Venice chose the doge.

As a public service, III Communication is providing this voters’ guide (with helpful cover songs!) for the teams in Conference III — you have to vote for the rest of the teams, too, but we’ll let your conscience be your guide deciding between Brian Campbell and Kris Versteeg.

Chicago Blackhawks: Patrick KaneSharp vs. Duncan Keith. We wanted Michal Rozsival, of course, but there’s no space for write-ins. That leaves us to choose between the guy with the same first name as pretty-boy taxi-driver face-puncher Kane and steady-as-a-rock blueliner Keith. III Communication endorses Jigsaw Duncan Keith. [Ed. Note: Sharp, Kane, whatever]

Colorado Avalanche: Matt Duchene vs. Gabriel Landeskog. If there’s one thing III Communication can’t tolerate, it’s the other lame divisions. If there’s another, it’s water chestnuts. If there’s a third, it’s teams that hand the captaincy to a young, marketable, face-of-the-franchise type, instead of a wizened warrior. Sorry, Las Vegas Landeskog, this round goes to Matt Duchene.

Dallas Stars: Jamie Benn vs. Kari Lehtonen. Despite playing in a small, non-traditional market, one Finnish goalie made it all the way to the finals last year. Of course, we would have backed Ray Whitney, but let’s give the Finns something to aim for again and vote for Kari Lehtonen.

Minnesota Wild: Mikko Koivu vs. Niklas Backstrom. Not sure why the Wild didn’t go for The Bromance here, but maybe they didn’t want to cause trouble in the relationship. Instead, they picked two Finns, one — Backstrom — a Swedish-speaking Finn. So potentially causing problems between Parise and Suter was a bridge too far, but potentially re-igniting strife that has plagued Finland for generations is AOK? Way to go Wild. This round, by the way, goes to Mikko Koivu.

Nashville Predators: Mike Fisher vs. Brandon Yip. Please, no contest. Brandon Yip.

[Ed. note: This is sort-of-kind-of a cover of a Herbie Hancock song. Deal.]

St. Louis Blues: David Perron vs. Alex Pietrangelo. Went back and forth on this one, but we’d like to see the designers fit Alex Pietrangelo and his giant neck on the cover.

Winnipeg Jets: Andrew Ladd vs. Evander Kane. Really? Not Blake Wheeler? C’mon. We’ll go with Evander Kane, just because he won’t get the support in the ‘Peg.