IIIiteracy: 24 June 2013

by J.R.

A recap of tonight’s Conference III Stanley Cup Final action with help from the geniuses at SportsYapper:

Chicago 3, Boston 2: Will tonight be the night? Is the wait over?

Golf-related chirps are hacky and since both teams in the Finals will be, theoretically, available for golf simultaneously, they are also stupid in this context.

Even yappers aren’t buying the Great NHL Injury Ruse. Yappers do however have interesting TD Garden bug theories.

Chris Kelly with the first goal on a pretty give-to and then fro from Tyler Seguin and others.

Did Boston tire themselves out in the first? We’ll see! Will the ice be better and help Chicago with their Conference III speed? We’ll see!

Jonathan Toews ties it up and Raypar doesn’t believe in fancystats.

I didn’t mention the four Bruins power plays or the single Chicago one because you all can guess how they ended.

The NHL definitely should investigate if Jeremy Jacobs can control the weather but they won’t, of course, because CONSPIRACY. Also, it is always really hot in Chicago and humidity was north of 100 percent today in Boston.

It’s best to only blame it on the refs if they are showing an obvious preference or even a preference you invented. It’s impossible to blame the refs if you admit they are doing well.

After a bad giveaway by Crawford and a bad giveaway by Keith, Lucic settles down a bingobango puck and puts it in.

Chicago had a power play after a Bruins high-stick with a chance to tie it up. LOL.

Chara’s throwin’ dudes but that’s hockey.

BEE EYE EN GEE OH AND BINGO WAS HIS NAME OH.

And then 17 seconds later, Dave Bolland bangs one in and it’s 3-2 with under a minute to go.

And the Cup is coming to Conference III. It’s the second best day of Conference III legend Bobby Orr’s life:

orr-1976-blackhawksx-large

Hit it Lyndsay:

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