Our Response In The Matter of The Royal Half v. III Communication

by J.R.

After the first edition of DemocraThree posted yesterday, we received the following letter from the attorney for The Royal Half, related to DemocraThre’s similarity to regular TRH feature “Pacific War Room.”


Our response, crafted by our chief counsel — T-Murda, Esq. — follows:

January 18, 2014

Dear Mr. Big Shot Hollywood Lawyer:

I am writing in response to your letter (hereinafter: The Demand)  of January 17, 2014 to my client Mr. J.R. Lind in his capacity as the editor of the outré Central Division blog III Communication in which you “directed” him to “cease and desist all copyright infringement” related to III Communication’s new feature “DemocraThree.”

Courtesy: Mighty Mike D

Courtesy: Mighty Mike D

Sir, I am like a combination of Atticus Finch and Boss Hogg and your demand, like your TV shows, is two hours late.

Using the Ding-Ding Standard established by the courts in the seminal trademark case D. Bowie et al. v. V. Ice, it is clear my client, while certainly inspired by the work of your client, made it his original work product by making material additions.

I proffer the videotaped deposition of Robert Van Winkle (a/k/a V. Ice) from 1990:

Making material additions has long been an affirmative defense against the rebuttal presumption of “what’s yours is yours” (cf. the Racing Stripe Precedent established by “Homer’s Enemy“).

Therefore, my client must politely decline your request to “cease and desist.” It is his intent to continue producing “DemocraThree” in light of your far-reaching assertion that your client owns “The Internet.” My client, indeed, continues to bring insightful hockey analysis and strained historical metaphors to the people of Real America (and also Winnipeg).

I consider this matter closed — Res ipsa loquitur.

If you have any further inquiries, you may direct them by email to conferencethree[at]gmail[dot]com.

With warmest regards,

T-Murda, Esq.
A Simple Country Lawyer