III Communication

Covering The NHL's Conference III Better Than Anyone On The Whole Internet. Like Ma Bell, We Got The III Communication

Category: Buzz3eed

Buzz3eed: How Conference III Can Win The Buffalo Way

by J.R.

Today, the Buffalo Sabres fired pretty much everybody, presumably because Terry Pegula was bored, and then hired as coach Ted Nolan — presumably because coaching Latvia isn’t an exhausting job and because, I guess, Peter Laviolette didn’t answer his phone.

In addition, Pegula brought in Pat LaFontaine as President of Hockey Operations, presumably because bringing back Old Heads is working so well in Colorado.

Buffalo being an example of a winning franchise, the concept of bringing in the team’s center from 1994 is something that might just catch on.

So what would happen in Conference III?

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Buzz3eed: Eight Places In Texas To Move The Minnesota Wild

by J.R.

In Monday’s Pioneer Press, columnist Charley Walters passed along this gem:

A little birdie says the Wild lost $30 million during their abbreviated 2012-13 season, and a cash call was made to team investors in February. The Wild paid bonuses totaling $20 million to sign free agents Zach Parise and Ryan Suter.

Now that seems almost silly — $30 million is an extraordinary amount of money to lose for a team that claimed 104 percent capacity, even in a lockout-shortened year in which they paid two players $20 million combined.

Of course, we are talking about Craig Leipold. The story of his business acumen can be found here. This is a man who took over a franchise that had a waiting list for season tickets. Then, four years later, he crowed about how spending $20 million on two players sparked season ticket sales. Logic tells us then that under Craig Leipold’s leadership, the season ticket base eroded for a team playing in the self-proclaimed State of Hockey. Great job, Craig.

Now, a caveat — the Wild weren’t the only Conference III team that had lockout problems. Attendance was up in Nashville, but the paid number was down with the overall figure buoyed by the team giving away nearly a literal ton of tickets per game.

In any event, this report of monetary troubles in Minnesota led to this obvious reaction from Monica McAlister at Kukla’s Korner:

Is the State of Hockey at risk of losing their second National Hockey League Franchise?

It has been 20 years, nearly to the day, that the Minnesota North Stars packed up and moved to the sunbelt and became the Dallas Stars; and low attendance and lost revenue during seasons where the team did not play up to the standards of their fan base.

All this based on a report sourced to a little bird — and let’s be real, how reliable are birds?

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Buzz3eed: 11 Reasons Why ‘Central Division’ Is Stupid

by J.R.

d3eDSeuYou may have heard — the NHL said Conference III is now the Central Division, at least according to them.

We shook our heads at this renaming-by-fiat; once again, we were the misfits, our entreaties ignored.

In short, like Jay Cutler, WE DOOOOOOOOON’T CAAAAAARE what the league calls us, we are calling us Conference III.

Rather than allowing us to embrace our new identity, Gary Bettman and William J. Daly III gave us an identity that already existed.

Granted, at least it’s not the Flortheast — now known as the Atlantic, despite having just one city on the Atlantic (two if you generously say Sunrise, Fla. is on the ocean). That division has more cities on the Great Lakes than it does the Atlantic.

Then there’s the Metropolitan, which I actually like as a name, even if it would have made more sense for the other division. If someone wants to start a Metro Division blog, Chris Cieslak has a great logo for you.

But we — the committee of notables — do have 11 reasons why Central is a stupid name.

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